Editing Implication

An '''implication''' (technically, an '''implicature''') is when someone says one thing in order to hint at another thing.

As a broad generalisation, if you want to say something, a common (amongst ourselves) autistic approach is simply to say it as directly and precisely as possible, truthful "to a fault", to avoid any kind of ambiguity or inaccuracy.

In stark contrast, it seems [[Allism|allistic]] people often instead opt to say something else entirely, that merely *hints at* the information they really want to convey.<ref name="rd-nts-tend-to-balance"/><ref name="rd-you-just-have-to-remember"/><ref name="rd-i-get-it"/>  Ambiguity is considered a feature, not a bug, because it allows plausible deniability.  There are two likely reasons for this:

# The person talking wants to avoid the embarrassment of being openly rejected or rebuked in some way
# The person talking wants to spare the person listening the risk of being offended, or similarly embarrassed

This is especially true if the listener outranks the speaker, something autistic people tend to forget to bear in mind, yet allistic people seem to care about.

If the listener doesn't agree or reciprocate, then both people involved are free to pretend the unrequited suggestion or observation wasn't even intended, even though it was.  This is most obvious with flirting in particular,<ref name="yt-elon-musk"/> but it seems it might be used by allistic people in ''many'' other contexts too.

Both the autistic and allistic approaches are valid (although mitigated speech can be dangerous in important situations),<ref name="bk-outliers"/> and both generally come naturally to their respective neurotypes, but as allistic people are far more common, the burden unfortunately falls upon autistic people to try to learn to speak the more popular allistic dialect.

This is especially important, as an autistic person speaking naturally to an allistic person won't be perceived as using a different dialect.  We'll be perceived as blunt and intense.<ref name="wp-bald-on-record"/><ref name="tw-1506365064764223489"/>  This causes some very unfortunate miscommunications amongst different neurotypes, and from a young age teaches autistic people the hard way that we need to [[Masking|speak unnaturally]] in order to fit in.

Conversely, an allistic person speaking naturally to an autistic person will be perceived as frustratingly cryptic, hinting at things using an unbreakable code.  But as autistic people are in a steep minority, allistic people are seldom going to cater to us by talking to us in a way we can easily interpret.

Now that I realise this, I finally understand why I'm perceived by allistic people as both "blunt" and yet "obtuse".  Unfortunately, knowing that most people will be talking to me at crossed purposes doesn't help me all that much to spot it happening and diffuse the situation.  I'll likely still find it hard to spot implications, and all but impossible to make my own.  I guess I'll find out how flat out asking "was that implying something?" works out...

== See also ==

* [[Phatic expression]]

== References ==

<ref name="bk-outliers">{{cite book|last=Gladwell|first=Malcolm|year=2008|title=Outliers|pages=194-198|isbn=978-0-316-03669-6|url=https://archive.org/details/outliersstoryofs0000glad/page/194/mode/2up}}</ref>
<ref name="rd-i-get-it">{{cite web|name=purple_baron|title=I get it, and I'm sorry|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/comments/njqtif/comment/gz91bm4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
<ref name="rd-nts-tend-to-balance">{{cite web|name=tuoder|title=NTs tend to balance their honesty with humility|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31e9ho/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
<ref name="rd-you-just-have-to-remember">{{cite web|name=tuoder|title=You just have to remember that being wrong, especially in front of other people, is embarrassing|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31f6y3/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
<ref name="tw-1506365064764223489">{{cite tweet|user=ChromaticIndigo|tweet-id=1506365064764223489|date=Mar 2022|title=Not using mitigated speech for something, for allistics (women especially), often implies heavy emphasis on that thing: indirect -> (surface) conflict-avoiding -> 'polite', so choosing to ''not'' be 'polite', by being direct, implies that the topic is strongly emotionally important to you, bc you're risking social conflict for it.  This can make an allistic listener interpret directness for confrontation, causing anxiety, confusion, or defensiveness.}}</ref>
<ref name="wp-bald-on-record">{{cite web|name=[Various]|title=Politeness theory: Bald on-record|url=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Politeness_theory#Bald_on-record}}</ref>
<ref name="yt-elon-musk">{{cite youtube|channel=Philosophy Tube|video-id=5gnlhmaM-dM&t=11m21s|date=2018-08-31|title=Elon Musk}}</ref>


[[Category:Allistic communication]]
@@ Line 26: / Line 26: @@
 == References ==
-<references>
+<ref name="bk-outliers">{{cite book|last=Gladwell|first=Malcolm|year=2008|title=Outliers|pages=194-198|isbn=978-0-316-03669-6|url=https://archive.org/details/outliersstoryofs0000glad/page/194/mode/2up}}</ref>
-<ref name="bk-outliers">''[https://archive.org/details/outliersstoryofs0000glad/page/194/mode/2up Outliers]'', Malcolm Gladwell, pages 194-198</ref>
+<ref name="rd-i-get-it">{{cite web|name=purple_baron|title=I get it, and I'm sorry|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/comments/njqtif/comment/gz91bm4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
-<ref name="rd-i-get-it">[https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/comments/njqtif/comment/gz91bm4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3 I get it, and I'm sorry]</ref>
+<ref name="rd-nts-tend-to-balance">{{cite web|name=tuoder|title=NTs tend to balance their honesty with humility|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31e9ho/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
-<ref name="rd-nts-tend-to-balance">[https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31e9ho/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3 NTs tend to balance their honesty with humility]</ref>
+<ref name="rd-you-just-have-to-remember">{{cite web|name=tuoder|title=You just have to remember that being wrong, especially in front of other people, is embarrassing|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31f6y3/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3}}</ref>
-<ref name="rd-you-just-have-to-remember">[https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergers/comments/df4khg/comment/f31f6y3/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3 You just have to remember that being wrong, especially in front of other people, is embarrassing]</ref>
+<ref name="tw-1506365064764223489">{{cite tweet|user=ChromaticIndigo|tweet-id=1506365064764223489|date=Mar 2022|title=Not using mitigated speech for something, for allistics (women especially), often implies heavy emphasis on that thing: indirect -> (surface) conflict-avoiding -> 'polite', so choosing to ''not'' be 'polite', by being direct, implies that the topic is strongly emotionally important to you, bc you're risking social conflict for it.  This can make an allistic listener interpret directness for confrontation, causing anxiety, confusion, or defensiveness.}}</ref>
-<ref name="tw-1506365064764223489">[https://twitter.com/ChromaticIndigo/status/1506365064764223489 Not using mitigated speech for something, for allistics (women especially), often implies heavy emphasis on that thing...]</ref>
+<ref name="wp-bald-on-record">{{cite web|name=[Various]|title=Politeness theory: Bald on-record|url=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Politeness_theory#Bald_on-record}}</ref>
-<ref name="wp-bald-on-record">[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Politeness_theory#Bald_on-record Politeness theory: Bald on-record]</ref>
+<ref name="yt-elon-musk">{{cite youtube|channel=Philosophy Tube|video-id=5gnlhmaM-dM&t=11m21s|date=2018-08-31|title=Elon Musk}}</ref>
-<ref name="yt-elon-musk">[http://youtube.com/watch?v=5gnlhmaM-dM&t=11m21s Philosophy Tube: Elon Musk]</ref>
-</references>
 [[Category:Allistic communication]]